Trump Translations

Buzzfeed posted an article yesterday called Here’s What Trump Supporters Believe Will Happen If He Doesn’t Win. Within, Trump voters proudly posed with their predictions for the U.S. in the event that it does not elect a cantaloupe that’s been sitting in a closed Igloo cooler since July 2007, somehow becoming both sentient and horrifyingly racist, as its next president. As you’ll see, they tried, but most of them are way off the mark.starrLet’s take a look at where they went wrong. All photos of people (besides Trogdor the Burninator) are credited to the above-referenced Buzzfeed post.

1

“I like memes because they allow me to express my shitty opinions using mostly pictures. My idea of ‘swole’ is a reanimated jack-o-lantern from 2007.”

2

“If our next president is willing to speak out against white supremacy, it might be less acceptable for me to be a racist, sexist mooseknuckle in public. I has a sad.”

3

Oh, sweetie. Imagine if you showed up at a Trump rally and he didn’t know you were a supporter. Imagine the things he would say about you.

4

Unlike that godawful caterpillar sprouting under your mouth, communism isn’t something that just “forms” out of neglect.

5

Someone with your browser history should probably be careful using the word “illegal” on the internet!

6

You mean worse than when its graduates gave Donald Trump the Republican presidential nomination? This statement is offensive to the primordial ooze from whence we came.

7

If this man can provide EVEN ONE MORE SENTENCE to explain what he means by this, I will give him $100.

8

Yes, Supervisor of Elections? My ballot was missing a candidate.

trog

 

9

The word I was looking for is probably “criminal”, but who even fucking knows at this point. I don’t know how quotes work! –this guy

10

Come on, Jessica, the Official Replace Every Citizen With A Clone Of Hillary By 2018 Project is like, waaaay down the priority list. It’s like, at least #3.

11

“@Arbys my wife said she was goin to pickup a Rueben on Tuesday night n I have nt seen her sence”- Jo Bloss

12

…Hunty, don’t flatter yourself. Also, nice fucking bolo tie.

14

Listen- I’m fine with my shitty, regressive opinion about The Blacks, but I know that THE LIBRUL MEDIA would turn it around to make me look like some RACSIST, so I’m forced to hide my face while expressing it. I am ashamed to live in my body, which is filled with hatred and completely rotted through to its sad little core. Everything about me is objectively fucking terrible.

15

What’s that, Lassie? Little Bobby has fallen down the well in Are Country and isn’t allowed to come out until he forms a complete thought?

16

Buzzfeed graciously interpreted this one for us as “It will suck”, probably to avoid looking like they were making fun of their subjects. Fortunately, I’m not bound by that obligation! The sign says “It Will Sucks”, which is incredibly rich coming from someone wearing ONE 1-inch-diameter hoop earring.

18

THAT’S NOT HOW THIS WORKS. THAT’S NOT HOW ANY OF THIS

FUCKING

WORKS.

21

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! The man I am voting for treats women like property and tosses them out as soon as they’re advised that any further vaginal reconstruction would be dangerous, and STILL not make it small enough to please His Royal Shrimpdickness.

22

Finally, a valid point! This young lady received many free elementary, middle, and high school classes, and still didn’t learn how to use the same tense for the entirety of one sentence or even CORRECTLY FUCKING SPELL THE WORD COLLEGE. Ergo, free school doesn’t work. Trump 2016: where we’re going, we don’t need schools!

23

I would love to spend just 5 minutes in a brain that says “if not Trump, then Bernie”.

Actually, wait. I take it back.

24

“I’ve taken one economics class and read all of the comments on a Yahoo article about Benghazi.”

25

No. No, you are not.

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6 comments

  1. Mike · March 16, 2016

    I read the original Buzzfeed article and was immediately filled with the most acute sense of despair about the American electorate. Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Carly's Into That · March 16, 2016

    oh, totally. it’s one of those things where if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry.* thanks for reading!

    *results not guaranteed. for example, I might still be crying even though I’ve also given myself reason to laugh! #merica

    Like

  3. avitable · March 16, 2016

    Oh my fuck. I wish you hadn’t done this so well because I wish I had thought of it.

    “Oh, sweetie. Imagine if you showed up at a Drumpf rally and he didn’t know you were a supporter. Imagine the things he would say about you.” made me fucking cry laugh.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Carly's Into That · March 16, 2016

    yaaaaas! this is exactly how I felt about your play on the “a day in the life of some white bitch who only eats raw organic smoothies” post.

    Like

  5. siddhartavicious · June 22, 2016

    Thank you so much for bringing these photos to my attention. Oh the memes.

    Like

  6. Valentina · August 6

    This was fun to look back on! Egads! There are too many ignorant people in our country right now… makes my head hurt.

    Like

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