Carly’s Into Bach, Week 4: Gettin’ Steamy in Singapore

Helloooooooooo and welcome back to Carly’s Into Bach, where we deeply apologize for this week’s post title!

It’s Week 4, and the gang is traveling to Singapore. From the episode teaser, it immediately becomes clear that Demi gon Demi REAL hard this week—but she’s not the only one throwing shade: During the announcement of the Singapore trip, Chris Harrison calls Hannah B “Caelynn”. Brutal! I’m here for it.

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Carly’s Into Bach, Week 3: Bachelorettes of the Caribbean

Goooooood morning, Bachelor Nation and sympathetic bystanders! Last night’s episode had everything: community theater pirates, surprise children, a “wardrobe stylist” wearing pinstriped fucking overalls, a beauty queen hissing like a velociraptor, and even some light BDSM! Without further ado…

GROUP DATE
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Our first group date includes Katie, Heather, Hannah B., Courtney, Kirpa, Tracy, Demi, and Caelynn. The perma-feud between Yung Demi and Tracy burns quietly in the background, but the producers are really hyping the beauty queen beef (BQB) this week.

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Carly’s Into Bach, Week 2: “Does she even have parents?”

Hello, fellow masochists and welcome to Week 2, where we are treated to our first one-on-one date, two group dates, and even more crying than Week 1! I have to warn you: this episode was so bad that it gave my dog diarrhea, every two hours, for the whole night! I look and feel like the undead, so let’s jump right in and get this over with!

FIRST GROUP DATE
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Demi, Catherine, Hannah G., Elyse, Onyeka, Tracy, Bri, and Nicole are selected for the first group date. They head to a theater where they’re greeted by Nick Offerman and Megan Mullally (please adopt me) and informed that today’s date involves… writing and telling stories of their “firsts” to a live studio audience of 200 people. Personally, I would rather die, but these girls are already in heavy competition for the coveted post-Bachelor Fit Tea Instagram sponsorship, so what’s a little public embarrassment??
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Carly’s Into Bach: Guess Who’s Bach? Bach Again?

HELLO, friends, and welcome back to Carly’s Into Bach! It’s been quite a while since our last venture into Scripted Love, and I’m sure we’re all straining against the handcuffs that fasten us to our couches very excited to be here.

In Recap City, it’s 8:01—the first minute of the THREE HOUR LIVE PREMIERE! What a gift!— and we already have our first reference to “going all the way”. Moments later, Christ Harrison winkily proclaims that Colton really has “something to lose”. Anyone who is drinking this month is legally required to finish their beverage whenever someone makes a virgin reference. Read More