After something like TEN WEEKS, we have almost made it to the end. We see a light and, though we know it is a train, we are still grateful. It’s Part 1 of the 2-part season finale, and it’s picking right back up after Luke unceremonious Second Dumping at the rose ceremony!
So, Chris Harrison has figured out that many people do not watch the Men Tell All episode. This is unfortunate, because then he figured out that if he weaves new #content into what used to be 2 hours of men yelling at each other, he can trick us into watching at least part of it. CURSE YOUUUUU, CHRIS HARRISON!
Welcome back to Carly’s Into Bach, where It’s! About! To Go! Down! And by it, I mean hopefully all of Hannah’s suitors except Luke! Heyooooooo!
We’re in Crete, Greece— an absolutely stunning setting for the explosion of fragile masculinity that’s about to take place! Are y’all ready?! You might not be ready.
*Flo Rida’s “Welcome To My House” plays aggressively in the background*
It’s time for hometowns, y’all! We’ve come so far. Are you ready to meet some very sweet dads and vaguely concerned moms?! Without further ado… Read More
Whaddup, dingdongs?? We’ve finally reached THE LAST WEEK BEFORE HOMETOWNS, and you know what that means: time to prepare the vodka funnel because Luke “5’8 Villain” P. is absolutely not going home yet, and is probably going to win, because God has abandoned us! Read More
Welcome back to Week 6 of Carly’s Into Bach, which is really Week 7 because Week 5 had two separate parts, so we’re only on the 6th rose ceremony, and this whole thing is really becoming far too complicated for a weekly blog feature!!
Hannah and the men are in Riga, Latvia, which Hannah—god bless her— must be contractually obligated to mention every 30 seconds. “Here we are in LAWT-VEE-UH!” Read More
Hello friends, and welcome to the recap of the worst Bachelorette episode ever— which, ironically, was 50% a recap itself!
I am Big Mad, and if you watched the episode, you already know why. If you didn’t: the episode was maybe one hour of Hannah/dudes/dating content… and an hour of Chris Harrison and Hannah PLAYING CLIPS OF ALREADY-SEEN FOOTAGE AND DISCUSSING THEM! Read More
Welcome back to Carly’s Into Bach, where our true joy is watching grown men squabble like toddlers in a sandbox! As you’ll recall, last week’s episode ended with no rose ceremony, so we’re picking up right where we left off: at the extremely uncomfortable cocktail party.
Hannah pulls the Lukes aside and tells them to talk to each other. She sits between them for ~3 minutes, watching them bicker and making this face:
…Then gets up and walks away, as she should, because this is soooooooo tired. Read More
Friends: are you in the market for a new vacuum? Did you get your current vacuum from your mom, used, in the Year of Our Lord 2011, because she was replacing it with “a good one”? Do you have a dog, a foster dog, and possibly a cat shedding all over literally everything you own, at every waking moment? Let me tell you about the Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum.
*slaps roof of Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum* This baby can hold a truly shocking amount of fur, dust, and leaves that Crouton shredded and left on the floor just to spite me.
WARNING: you may feel physically ill as you’re emptying the canister of the Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum for the third time in one cleaning sesh, despite the fact that you vacuumed with Ol’ Bissell just one week ago!
This vacuum has everything: attachments; a brush roll that turns on for carpet and off for hard surfaces; a retractable cord; a pleasing blue-colored handle; a speaker that plays lullabies to soothe your pets while you torture them with the Big Loud Scare Machine; MTV’s Dan Cortez…
Many friends recommended that I purchase a Shark or a Dyson, and while I’m sure those are also great, they are NOT currently on sale for $100 at Target. As many of you know, I work at a university #BallinOnABudget.
So if you’re like me, and are looking for a new vacuum that IS currently on sale for $100 at Target, I highly recommend that you check out the Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum. #SponsoredPost #JK #ImJustExcited #HooverGetAtMeTho #IHaveVenmo
Me and my new best friend! Photobomb by Lucy, our foster dog/temporary fur machine.
Hey y’all! We’re back for another scintillating Monday night on The Bachelorette. The episode kicks off with Chris Harrison telling the men that they’re “wheels up in an hour” for… Newport, Rhode Island.
The final 15 guys arrive at their new digs (a Radisson) where they receive the first date card, which says: “Jed—meet me in Boston.” Read More
Carly's Into That 