Friends: are you in the market for a new vacuum? Did you get your current vacuum from your mom, used, in the Year of Our Lord 2011, because she was replacing it with “a good one”? Do you have a dog, a foster dog, and possibly a cat shedding all over literally everything you own, at every waking moment? Let me tell you about the Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum.

*slaps roof of Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum* This baby can hold a truly shocking amount of fur, dust, and leaves that Crouton shredded and left on the floor just to spite me.

WARNING: you may feel physically ill as you’re emptying the canister of the Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum for the third time in one cleaning sesh, despite the fact that you vacuumed with Ol’ Bissell just one week ago!

This vacuum has everything: attachments; a brush roll that turns on for carpet and off for hard surfaces; a retractable cord; a pleasing blue-colored handle; a speaker that plays lullabies to soothe your pets while you torture them with the Big Loud Scare Machine; MTV’s Dan Cortez…

Many friends recommended that I purchase a Shark or a Dyson, and while I’m sure those are also great, they are NOT currently on sale for $100 at Target. As many of you know, I work at a university #BallinOnABudget.

So if you’re like me, and are looking for a new vacuum that IS currently on sale for $100 at Target, I highly recommend that you check out the Hoover Wind Tunnel 2 Whole House Rewind Upright Vacuum. #SponsoredPost #JK #ImJustExcited #HooverGetAtMeTho #IHaveVenmo